Happy

I'm generally a "glass half full" kind of gal on the outside. Within society, I find more peace in showing happiness, so most people just assume that I'm happy.

Though the truth is, I struggle with genuinely being happy.



I want to be happy but anxiety and lack of self confidence are quick happiness killers. I have bipolar tendencies and there are days where I so desperately WANT to be happy, but it's just not obtainable.

Then there are mornings like today where I wake up, not only content, but happy where I'm at.

It's taken a lot of work to get there. It's a daily battle. It's something I have to work towards and really want.

Between focusing on what I, personally, need to make me happy, and the change in the future, I've been definitely feeling it lately. There's change in the horizon and I'm ready to embrace it but for now, I'm loving where I'm at. Things are good, and that makes my heart happy.

This morning, when my alarm went off, I woke up curled up next to my husband. You see, he's one of the best things to ever happen to me. He totally accepts all my crazy and yet still wants to cuddle with me at the end of the day. This man deserves an f'n gold medal in life.

Then as I was getting ready, I got surprised by a nice big hug on my leg from one of my favorite little dudes. You can't help but smile when you hear "ood mornin' momma!" and feel him kiss your leg before he runs off to the kitchen for breakfast. He sure knows the quick way to my heart!

Just before I headed out the door for the day, I crawled back in bed with my wonderfully sleepy husband who is off work this week and just felt his skin under my hands. I could hear his heart beat and smell his scent- something that has always relaxed me. After experiencing a year without him years ago, I still don't take for granted the little things about him. I'm thankful for every morning I get granted next to him.

As I was leaving for work I was showed with lots of "Luvs!" and "have a good day" and kisses from all the minions. One thing I've prided myself in is the way you can feel the love in our house. I feels good getting showered in it.

You can't help but be happy with that sort of start to your day. The most important things in my life are happy, and that make me happy.

Then I showed up to my job where I'm completely accepted as me. I'm always running a little late (nothing super significant) and they know and accept that. You see, I love my job. It's not perfect but I really like it. I work with great, down to earth, people who have great senses of humor. I laugh a lot while I'm hear and the best part is: I know my job makes a difference. Not just to someone's wallet, but to a community as a whole. I've seen it in action- It's a WONDERFUL feeling.

So for today, I'm going to enjoy this genuine happy that I'm feeling.
It's a great day :)